We all know this kind…the one that would rather do it himself than have someone that actually knows what they are doing complete the job. He asks you on a regular basis “why pay someone else when I can do it myself? How hard could it be?” This master plumber, electrician, auto mechanic and wood worker would rather do the job 5 times wrong spending 3 times as much money than suck up his pride for 3 freakin’ seconds and pay someone to do the job correctly or actually take the time and effort to ask someone who knows what they are doing. This ingenious worker really does believe that a 12 pack of Budweiser and a little elbow grease can conquer even the most difficult jobs without the aid of actual knowledge of the subject at hand. It doesn’t have to last for forever…just long enough to show the wife that I was actually smart enough to complete the job! I’ll show her who the man in the house is! How dare she roll her eyes at me and say, “yeah…suuuureeee you can do it. I’ll get the yellow pages ready…”
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A note to the do-it-yourself expert
I Hate Your Outside Cat!
I am going to piss off just about every cat owner out there with this article…but I DON’T CARE! I hate your outside cat! Last night, I am sitting with my wife trying to enjoy a nice dinner. Our two Boxers are blissfully playing in our fenced in backyard…did I mention it was fenced in? Ok…just making sure. All of the sudden, my 75 pound male, Hans, is losing his f’in mind. He is barking and running all over the backyard. As I walk outside to see what all of the ruckus is about and to stop him from barking (I am one of those neighbors who KEEPS his dogs from annoying everyone else in the ‘hood), I notice that he is now jumping on the fence that he doesn’t think he can clear! You know…because the reason we have a fenced in backyard is to keep our pets from annoying/bothering/etc. the rest of the neighborhood.
Your Local Expert On Everything
Ahhh…your local expert on everything. You know this individual very well. He honestly believes that no matter what room he is in…he is the smartest man in that room on everything. Have a subject that you think he can’t handle? Ha! He laughs in the face of your stupidity with completely wrong facts and figures that he is going to convince you are real and true. There is no subject on this Earth that he can’t handle. This self proclaimed expert has the arrogance and ego that only a man of his stature can possess. Only a man as great as he has the right to think this highly of himself. How dare you question is reasoning or thoughts? Don’t you realize that you are at the bottom of the totem pole? This man is so good that he doesn’t need experience, knowledge or a brain cell to be right…he is just blessed with all knowing knowledge about everything!
The Uninterested Cashier
This situation blows my mind every time I am presented with such blatant rudeness out of an employee. This morning, I headed out to a Wal-Mart in Brevard, NC. I had to pick up a couple of simple things for my afternoon…2 gig SD card and some Energizer Lithium AAA batteries. Sounds easy right? This should be a simple, painless task no matter which Wal-Mart you visit in the continental United States…wrong! Why? Because the cashier that IS PAID to do her job decided that she didn’t really want to work this morning. It doesn’t matter that she being paid to be there and perform a service. She would rather continue blowing gigantic gum bubbles and pretend that you…the customer…is not even there!
Nadya Suleman – The Octuplets Disaster
This has to be my #1 most annoying thing right now. How the hell did a woman like this ever get even the chance to have this many children (14 total)??!! She couldn’t even afford the kids she already had! Now…she is spending our hard earned tax money that we slave day in and day out to pay to the government to fuel her insanity. I don’t need a job to take care of all of these kids…I’ll just beg and have the government pay for it! Fantastic idea! Take hard working people’s money!
You have probably already read all of the headlines and news stories about the request for donations and other madness surrounding this waste of space, leach on society, so I am not going to bore you with the details of events you already know. I am going to tell you the two reasons that this waste of a life annoys me the most which hasn’t been publicly announced as far as I can find. Every news story so far has centered around her website (don’t ask for the link) and her want to buy new things with all of her government money. (more…)
