Some of you might not be aware of this, but the Mexican population has a special way of pimpin’ out their rides. This does not apply to all and there are some of them out there that know how to do it right…but the vast majority in our area could write “How To Butcher A Car For Dummies”.

I honestly do not know what the root cause is, but if they go into an auto parts store and see any sticker that has flames, a Nike check logo, chrome bolt on parts or wheels that don’t actually fit their car…they HAVE TO BUY IT. It is something in their nature that makes that a must have item for their early ’90′s Honda. They just can’t go without it!

So what makes up the Mexican Guide to Car Customization?

• Clear/Euro Styled Taillights
• Unpainted Ground Effects (matching the car model is not the preferred method)
• Flame Stickers
• CD’s Hanging from the Rear View Mirror
• Any Picture of Mary or Jesus (preferably painted)
• Holographic Tented Windows
• Mismatched Colors and Parts
• Wheels and Tire Combo’s that don’t match the car and are the wrong size
• Your name in huge letters on the windshield
• Anything chrome
• Painted mural of your car performing a task…on your car!

Long story short, if you are going to mimic this design style…you need to perfect the art of bad taste. It truly baffles me how they can take a decent looking car and turn it into a jumbled, bolt on infested mess! You have to completely ignore if the part is made for your model of car or not and completely surrender to mismatching bliss. There is never a spot that should not be filled with some sort of sticker or chrome piece. Your car is your pallet…create!

I have had an idea for awhile that would make a million dollars if I ever ran with it. I should buy a container load of clear/euro styled tail lights for early ’90′s Honda Accords and sell them for cash in Mexican neighborhoods. They would be gone in a day and I would have enough cash for the government to take 1/2 and I would still make out!

Everyone knows one  of these people. They just can’t seem to do ANYTHING quietly. Every move, every word and every action in their life has to be at a volume that just isn’t acceptable to the world around them.

You are having a nice quiet cup of coffee at the office trying to clear your brain as you get ready for the day. Maybe its spring and you can hear the birds chirping outside. All of the sudden…SLAM! GOOD MORNING!!!…COUGH! SNEEZE!…HOW ARE YOU?! That’s right…your loud coworker is here to disrupt the entire office! Great! Just what I was looking forward to this morning! Worse yet, all of that noise came from the complete other side of the office. He hasn’t even really made it over your way yet, and to add a cherry to this sundae…his office is right across from yours! Now you get to listen to the obnoxious speaker phone conversations and annoying music that you hate all day long! It doesn’t get much better than this…

We all have at least one of these people in our lives. They can not do any action in their daily lives without it being LOUD and ANNOYING! There is a total lack of awareness of the events going on around them…or even worse…they just don’t care. It doesn’t matter if you are on an important phone conversation, they will come up and try to have a loud conversation right next to you.

So…thank you loud, abnoxious guy…for disrupting the peace in our daily lives and keeping companies like Advil in business.

Without you…

• We would have that peace and quiet that we hate so much.
• We would be able to complete those thoughts that we never wanted to finish.
• We wouldn’t know that you can actually shake the Earth out of orbit with a simple sneeze.
• We wouldn’t know you were still breathing without your constant sighs.
• We wouldn’t know that you want your wife to Tivo The Office as we check out in the grocery store.
• Without you…life would be boring…

Yeah right…quiet down! You are getting on my freaking nerves!!!

So what started the idea of this site and the whole premis behind it? Something that annoys the absolute hell out of me! I know…big surprise given the domain name.

So I am driving down 400 south this morning and I come across that typical sideways driver. What is a sideways driver you might ask? They are one of the most annoying creatures on the planet when you are driving in periods of high traffic.

A sideways driver pays more attention to the drivers next to them…instead of the ones in front of them! These drivers are those ignorant, unaware drivers that insist on going the same speed as the car next to them in traffic completely unaware of what they are creating by leaving a gigantic gap in their lane.

So what is the end result? You get this unaware driver in the far left lane not paying attention to what is going on around them. The space between their car and the one in front of them continues to grow. You then change lanes and maneuver your way around so that you can pass this selfishness and what do you get for your trouble? A dirty look from the driver that wasn’t paying attention to begin with!!!

As others find your infinite passing wisdom as a great idea, they are now darting to the right as well causing even more of a mess. It is pure road hazard craziness as the driver who started it all goes on oblivious!

If traffic is really bad, you have everyone in the world inching forward to get in front of this super intellect putting you further and further down the line.

So what should we do to punish this kind of road behavior?

I think we should be permitted to bump draft and inact a rule where they should be put into the wall. It’s time to bring back old school Nascar racing. Bump drafting would speed the whole line up and slamming their oblivious ass into the wall would prevent future behavior. What do you think?